I’m freaking out!

I’m freaking out trying to “finalize” my notes and the study guide for the dvd project:

– “This is TOO deep. No one will want to follow all of this. Why do I keep using all of these theological terms? What is WRONG with me?!”
– “This is SO simple! Everyone knows this! Why am I even DOING THIS ANYWAY? This has ALL been said a MILLION times by a MILLION people who all said it a MILLION TIMES better than I ever could.”
– “AURGH! This is too much material!”
– “DOUBLE AURGH! Everyone has already HEARD all of this and HEARD all of these examples! I should ADD NEW STUFF!”
– “TRIPLE AURGH! Now instead of two HOURS of material I consistently try to shove into 60 or 90 minute sessions at retreats NEEDING TO BE STUFFED INTO 30 MINUTES … I have EVEN MORE!”

AAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Guess that’s why, when Fred came upstairs two minutes ago to empty the garbages, I said:

“I can’t do it. It’s too hard.”

And WHAT, pray tell, was his encouraging response?

“GOOD. Let’s pray.”

I guess it’s too late to back out now.
Would not be very honoring of ALL of the work that’s been going on down in SC to get ready for this project.
Guess I’ll just do my best.

Good ol’ Fred.
Way to remind me that it’s not about me.

Oh–and I SINCERELY hope that you all are having a MUCH more relaxing and restful Saturday than I am.

🙂

Your freaking-out-a-little-less pal,
Tara B.