Church Conflict Makes Us “Stupid”

I’m not a big fan of the use of the word “stupid,” so I assume this paragraph will be substantially edited between now and June 1. But it does kind of make me smile a little. The rawness of it is a great example of the conference calls Cap’n Dave and I have been having this year on “Redeeming Church Conflicts”:

“Even wise and seasoned Christians often jettison their theology when conflicts come because church conflict has a propensity to freeze us all, just like the proverbial deer in the headlights. Even solid theology flies right out the window during church conflicts. Christians get locked in personal offenses, lose their perspective, and facilitate only destructive conversations.  The old statement, ‘Sin makes us stupid’ could be restated as ‘Church conflict makes us stupid.’ It’s true! Even the most intelligent, astute, biblical Christian will be tempted to look ‘stupid’ when facing church conflict. As mediators who have sat between great theologians who could run circles around us intellectually, we can describe with great detail what it looks like to see their theological training and maturity melt down under the fire of relational strife. Bright, caring Christians can act like dull, loveless unbelievers when they are attacked and accused, threatened and rejected. Left to their own devices, no matter how high their IQ or how many post-graduate degrees they have attained, most Christians will either run away from church conflict or exacerbate church conflict. It is not easy to help conflicted Christians to come back to their senses, but it is possible …”