Actually Setting Your House in Order

  • Actually Setting Your House in Order,  Eulogy for a Bad Mother

    What do you want us to do when your heart stops beating?

    I am a strong proponent of basic estate planning, including discussions and documents (powers of attorney / living wills) re: end-of-life decisions. It seems to me that being an adult means that you invest a little bit of time and money to keep track of (and distribute) your assets and liabilities, ensure clear guardianship for your minor children, and empower the people you want to handle medical and financial decisions for you in case of your incapacitation/death. And I’m not saying that just because I am an estate planning attorney. I sincerely think these things are important and worth the investment of time and money to have handled correctly. But today, in…

  • Actually Setting Your House in Order,  Peace Amidst Holiday Strife

    Money (Holiday Misery Part 3)

    This entry is part 3 of my blog series on things that tempt us to be miserable during the holidays. I’ll start with a quick recap of what we’ve covered so far and then jump into today’s topic. 1. Comparisons: We live in a world of competition and performance, even (tragically) in the church. No one wants to look ugly, sound stupid, or be a relational flop … It doesn’t matter how much we have or what blessings our lives contain. If we do not guard our hearts, the holidays will tempt us to compare ourselves with others and focus on what we perceive as the lack. But it doesn’t have to be…

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  • Actually Setting Your House in Order

    It’s Time. Name Guardians, Sign Your Powers of Attorney, and Get Your Basic Estate Planning Done (!).

    Tonight I will meet with some friends to help them finish a task they’ve been meaning to do for, well, years: Get a Will Name Guardians for Our Children Figure Out What the Heck Powers of Attorney & Living Wills Are and Maybe Get One? Or Two? Maybe some of you can relate … You’re adults. You have young children. You know you should have those basic estate planning documents, but oh! Those pesky lawyers are so expensive. And you’re just barely living month-to-month financially, so what does it really matter anyway? It. Matters. Not just because you have young children–but because so many of the financial medical issues that you may be facing one…

  • Actually Setting Your House in Order

    Please Don’t Make My Funeral About Me

    Since my “How to Write a Eulogy for a Bad Mom” article continues to be one of my most-read articles ever, I can only assume that this topic is a hot one. It is also, I would guess, a painful one for many of us who are not buying Mother’s Day cards this year because we are missing our moms (both “good” and “bad” moms and aren’t all moms both? just in different ways? I know I am!). I actually had the most realistic dream about my mother recently. It was so sweet. We were just talking like normal, like we used to do pretty much every day. And then I…

  • Actually Setting Your House in Order

    Basic Estate Planning

    Here are my notes for today’s “(Actually!) Setting Your House in Order” Sunday School class. We’re tackling the topic of BASIC ESTATE PLANNING: INTRODUCTION 1. Disclaimers/Goals: a. It’s been a long time since Tara has practiced law as an estate planning attorney—and even when she was actively licensed: a) it was in Illinois, not Montana; and b) she practiced in a highly specialized area of the law (high net worth/charitable estate planning), not general practice. Therefore … b. This Sunday School Class is NOT going to provide you with any specific legal advice. Either you will research, prepare, and execute your documentation yourselves (without legal counsel) or you will need…

  • Actually Setting Your House in Order

    Your Money Counts

    Fred and I are beginning to work hard to (try to) pull it together and teach well our Sunday school class: (Actually!) Getting Your House in Order. This is the description that’s been running in our church’s bulletin: “(Actually!) Setting Your House in Order: Deacon Fred Barthel and his wife Tara will lead this class to help all families (this includes singles of course!) to ‘set their houses in order’ regarding financial stewardship, budgets, credit card debt, life insurance, estate planning, tithing, student loans, and any other related topics that come up during the course of the semester. Participants will not only learn about these topics, they will be encouraged…